Monologue: Woman, 40s, Old Hollywood Femme Fatale Type

This is a monologue from ABANDON ALL HOPE by Peter Fenton for the role of TERESA. ABANDON ALL HOPE is a dark comedy play that premiered at Theatre Row in 2023 as part of Rogue Theater Festival. This copyrighted monologue is free for use in audition and educational settings. The full play can be read on New Play Exchange or by purchasing a copy. © 2022 by Peter Fenton. All rights reserved.

About the Character:

TERESA (40s/Any Ethnicity/Female-presenting) A fun-loving, strategic mastermind film noir femme fatale type assuming the role of a trickster demon. Despite her immortality, she has existential questions of her own. She was once human prior to working for the afterlife. In life, she was an actress in the golden age of Hollywood (stage name "Hope Ambrosia") who never got her big break.

About the Play:

Basically No Exit if Jean-Paul Sartre was raised Baptist. When three college freshmen (a scrappy feminist, a naïve evangelical, and a cocky analyst) meet in Hell—which appears as a dorm room—a fun-loving demon forces them to play a game with eternal stakes: The winner goes to Heaven. The others are tortured for eternity.

MELISSA

How did you die?

TERESA

Excuse me?

MELISSA

You said you were once human. How did you die?

TERESA

Did I?

My father was the Reverend Henry Prescott. I met the man once. Once was plenty. I’m sure he had a nice wife. Gorgeous kids—I mean, look at me. He took a trip to Manhattan in 1885. Met Sybil Aronowitz in some back alley. Nine months later, there I was! Mother sent a very clear message when she named me. Marian Teresa Prescott. Translated literally? Bitter spawn of a preacher. With a moniker like that, I knew in my bones that I’d never find a home in the church or the synagogue... so I went looking for one. A real home. And by god, for a moment, I found it. The Golden Age of Hollywood--or, to everyone else, the Depression. I was known the whole world over as Hope Ambrosia. Hollywood starlet. Grande dame of the silver screen. Well, I might’ve been if I’d booked Kong.

Old-school film reel is heard rolling alongside the faint sound of a piano in a Prohibition-era speakeasy.

TERESA

No, I died in the bathtub on March 3, 1933. Sometimes I like to think about that day I died like it’s an old movie... It’s easier to digest.

My agent dumped me that morning. Said he couldn’t tell if I had talent, or talent enough, to book a leading lady role in my “advancing age.” So I went home. I lived on the Upper West Side. No husband to hold me back, or lift me up. I drew a bath. Bubbles. Candles. Rose petals. The whole thing. I held a glass of Cabernet in one hand. A mirror in the other. I was looking at every wrinkle on my face, thinking about my “advancing age” and that bitch Fay Wray stealing my big break. And so I smashed the mirror on the side of the tub. Glass flew everywhere. One particularly pointy shard got me right here.

She points to her jugular vein.

TERESA

I went light-headed and sunk under the water. Did I bleed out? Did I drown? Did anyone find me? I don’t know. Next thing I knew, I woke up in some boring room and they handed me paperwork to fill out. Took me a week to fully realize I was even dead.

Old-school film reel rolls to a stop.

TERESA

And you know what’s funny, ever since that day in the bath, this question’s been nagging at the very fiber of my soul: Did I ever really have the chops to make it as a leading lady?

***

That's the end of the excerpt! If you want to read more from this play, go over to the plays page on this website. If you want to check out more monologues by Peter Fenton, there are a few on the blog.

Want to use it in an audition or in a classroom setting?

Be my guest! This material is free to use for those settings only. While I'd love to know that you resonated enough with my words to use it as part of your audition or class, you do not need to ask me permission. All I ask is that you credit me as the author and the play that it came from.

Want to perform it publicly or use it in a different way?

Please contact me and explain your situation. We'll come up with an agreement that makes sense and is fair to us both.